In High School I was known as a “big guy” meaning I was simply to based and redpilled for my fellow classmates. This resulted in my friend group consisting of either:
1) Gay Men.
2) Men who like bodybuilding.
3) Smite Players.
If you haven’t noticed not a single woman pops up in this list. Was Mr. Moleson a no pussy having mf? On the contrary good sir I was rolling in pussy like I was literally on fire. This article well delve into what got me, Cole R. Moleson, pussy.
I was in the 11th grade of my high school meaning I had to take an U.S. History class. While U.S. History is great for everyone who wants to learn less about America I was determined to be the “biggest guy” meaning I choose to take APUSH. Now U.S. History as a class is not hard, pretty much all of American History can be summarized as Dudes Rocking. With this knowledge I not only got an A in the class but a 5 on the AP Test. However my numerous accomplishments are not the subject matter at hand.
Instead I’m going to be talking about the time I choose to be a class clown. Now usually in class I would never raise my hand or get along with other classmates since I was more interested in listening to my favorite Based God mixtape, 6 Kiss. The teacher of my class was a fairly young women who pretty just made of fun of everyone in the class (I think she got tenure or something idk). Now while her libtarded view of history was pretty cucked and bluepilled it was still my favorite class. While the gay dogs out there are mad that I didn’t think math was the best class I simply do not care about the opinions of someone who thinks Hayek is better than Mises.
One person our teacher made fun of was a guy from another period. For privacy reasons and also because lol it’s funny I am going to say that his name is Seymour. Now anytime Seymour was mentioned class everyone would start laughing before the teacher even said anything about what Seymour. It seemed like everyone had something that happened with Seymour. However do you know who didn’t know about Seymour? This guy!
So while the class would be making fun of Seymour I simply did not care and fantasized about having sex with Persian women. Many people would share stories about their interactions with Seymour. The more I heard about this Seymour the more I liked him. I mean he pissed off an entire class filled with mayo monkeys, he must be doing something right.
The teacher for some reason commented on my lack of engagement with Seymour (like fr this mf ranted about him all the time like bitch I am here to learn about epic trad white people not some lame loser who probably hasn’t even listened to Thug Motivation 101). I responded by saying I don’t know who this Seymour character is. The teacher responded by mentioning his last name which was “Schwartz” and saying how can you not know who this is. I laughed when I learned his last name was Schwartz because I watched Breaking Bad (again I was an intellectual) and knew that Schwartz is German for Black. After laughing for a few seconds I said something that would completely change my social status. “This guy has a color for his last name, what a retard!”
When I said this I thought I uttered the most well written joke in 11th Grade. However nobody laughed with most people looking fairly confused. Sadly I forgot the worst thing about Californian youth. They are all bluepilled.
Anyway after that I banged a hot Persian chick, in my mind of course realizing that I have become the biggest guy on Earth who is friends with tons of gay extremely buff Smite players.
The moral of the story is. Persian women fr all 9/10 or better like holy shit bro that’s crazy!
Also all the fellow big guys reading this just know ya’ll getting mad head tonight!
mr cole r moleson can you send me one of your gay buff gamer friends